God I should update more. I've been really bored lately and not much has happened and I really haven't felt like writing anything. On the rare occasions that I have actually felt like writing, the computer's been occupied by my ever-so-hard-working dad who is here 24/7 working on the comp. And when he leaves around midnight, and if a miracle happens and I get to the comp before my brothers, I can't write anything because there's always someone on MSN who wants to talk. I've been talking especially with that guy who I met at Royal Onnela in December. He's cool, I'm seeing him when I get back to Finland but.. I don't know if it will evolve into anything more than just a friendship. I don't mind if it does but if it doesn't, I'm cool with it. No harm done. I just don't know.. in some ways we're really alike but then there are things about him that tick me off sometimes. I'm sure he thinks the same about me, in fact I think he himself SAID so. I don't mind because I know it's true, I can be a real pain in the ass sometimes. Though he didn't say so, I think his exact words were that I "really got to his nerves" but anyway. He got on my nerves too that one time. I mean, we were talking about the importance of what you eat compared to the importance of exercise (I guess you could say he's kinda sporty, he plays basketball (he's like 187cm tall) and goes to the gym and what not) if you want to lose weight/stay fit/whatever. He said that what you eat doesn't really matter as long as you exercise regulary and I said that I disagree because there's no way you can lose weight/stay fit/whatever even if you exercise regularly if you eat at McDonald's every god damn day. And then he got a bit mad, i.e. "I got to his nerves". And I was like wtf, who gets mad because of something like that? Sure he might now something about this since he does sports and stuff but I know a thing or two about dieting as well. Oh well, it's water under the bridge... And besides, I sorta like the challenge if you know what I mean. I've seen him only once but I know he's smart (no surprise, he's 4 years older than me and just graduating), definitely not dumb and I sorta.. well I don't know if this is the right way to say it, but I sorta look up to him because of all of this. I could never even consider going out with someone who's dumber than me or someone that I didn't respect. Ok, I think the fact that I think someone is dumb already shows that I don't respect that person... Hmm. Anywho, you get my point.

My friend M finally gave up and joined Facebook and one of the first things she did was add two pics of her, A and me that she took on last week's Monday when we had dendrology and M's Greek friend (some 29-year-old guy) was visiting Belgrade and was at uni with M. He was funny and I didn't mind a lot that he was staring at my boobs while he talked to me. I can't really blame people for doing it because I'm sorta well equipped (meaning my boobs are a bit on the big side) and I love shirts and tops with low cleavages, so some people might even say that I'm asking for it. I'm not, I just like the way low cleavages look on me. And besides, I spent my whole time in high school hating my "equipment" even if they were smaller then, but here in Serbia I realized that there's really not much I can do about it and that I might as well enjoy them and make the most of it, and if guys like them (and they sure seem to), who am I to complain? Anyway, I was trying to tell you something.. Oh yeah, the pics. M added them and I don't look that bad in them but still, they're not exactly my favourite pics.. But which are? I like hardly any pics of myself. So, I went to the minimarket round the corner yesterday after some serious shopping, and the guy I know was working there at the time. We usually talk a bit, nothing special, about uni and the junkies that live here on our street, stuff like that. So yesterday he was like, "I saw your pic the other day!" and I was horrified because I'm not very photogenic. I asked him where he saw the pics, even if I knew he meant Facebook, and he said that he had seen them on the said FB and I just KNEW he had seen M's pics. Turned out that M is his friend's friend and he had recognized me from the pics. I'm not really sure if I like it. This world is too damn small! Though I know I should be lucky since the photos could've been really horrible, and after all M had asked me if she could tag me. I really appreciate it if people ask before tagging ugly photos of me.

So I was shopping yesterday, trying to find a nice party dress for this summer - didn't succeed - but I did find two lovely lovely pairs of dangling earrings and a pair of fake aviator glasses that I think I'm in love with. They look awesome. Fantastic. Phenomenal. I know I'm materialistic but how can someone NOT love them? And all the other pretty things that this world has to offer, like the earrings that I bought. They were mine the moment I saw them. Like the outrageous canary yellow high heels that I saw at Mango, at least until I heard that they cost 70 euros. God damn, 70 euros..! And I'm supposed to save money. I didn't buy them yet but I might go back today to get them. They looked so... wow. They're exactly what I've been looking for, I mean EXACTLY, but why do they have to be so expensive? I don't even think they're real leather. I don't know if 70e is too much for a pair of plastic Mango high heels, no matter how pretty they are or how loud they're shouting my name and telling me how good they'd look with a pair of skinny jeans. Sigh.

Only 10 days until I see Marina and Tinkku! I really can't believe how fast time has flewn by. It feels like it was just a month ago that I returned from Finland feeling like crap... and it's been 4,5 months. And I still have to wait 38 days until I'm back in Finland! But it's not that bad since I know that I really will be there then. And my dad isn't lecturing me every day anymore, trying to make me change my mind. Apparently I'm possessed by the devil and this is the biggest mistake I could possibly make.. But what if I really can't see nothing wrong with it?? I mean, I haven't been this happy in ages and it makes me think that.. that if this really makes me this happy, is it so wrong to "abandon God" as dad puts it? He keeps asking me why I want to go back and when I say that I feel like crap here and that I'd feel a lot better in Finland, his answer is "who cares about feelings, we weren't put on this Earth to be happy but to suffer". And I can't really do much else but stare at him in disbelief and say nothing. I really can't say anything because I don't want to tell him that I don't believe a word that he's telling me. I'm already a big enough disappointment the way I am, no need to make things worse. ANYWAY. Our family friend, the one who buys Sarplaninac dogs from Serbia (I think he's some sort of a breeder), is probably coming here next weekend from Finland and he said he could take some of my stuff because he travels by car. I should start packing my books and CDs and winter boots and other winter clothes then.. Those are the things I'm going to ask him to take with him to Finland because there's no way I can get them there by plane. I'm sorta excited, actually packing my stuff means it's really happening. I mean, really really happening.

Something to listen to:
Akon ft. Zion - The way she moves
Ying Yang Twins - Drop